In Defence of Non Hijabi Sisters | SoundVision.com

In Defence of Non Hijabi Sisters

It had been ten years since she had set foot in a mosque. Being at university had broadened her mind in many ways, one of them being her reconnecting with Islam.

She had begun praying five times a day a month ago, and now felt ready to pray in public, at the university's Juma prayer.

She paused and stood a few feet away from the women's entrance. Taking a deep breath, she pulled the silk scarf out of her purse and tied it carefully on her head. Her ponytail stuck out a bit. She smoothed the creases on her long-sleeved beige shirt and tugged at the bottom of it to make it longer over her pants.

The prayer was great. She had never felt this sense of inner peace.

Afterwards, she tried mingling with the sisters, but nobody even looked her way. A few of them even pretended not to hear her greeting. The only sister who did talk to her said in a huff: “You know your prayer is not accepted in those pants and that tiny thing you pass for a Hijab. I suggest you get more Islamic knowledge and dress properly before coming back here.”

The words stung her like a million bumble bees. Too numb to respond or speak, she charged out of the hall. Never again would she associate with these people, she told herself.

And never again would she return to Juma.

*******************

Are you shocked reading about this incident? Don't be. It has been a reality in almost every Muslim community in North America.

This harsh judgment and intolerance shown towards Muslim women who do not wear Hijab can lead to at least some Muslim women to become alienated from the Muslim community, and could lead to a loss of Islamic practice.

You can find many Quran Hijab Quotes becasue Hijab is an obligation clearly ordained in the Quran and Sunnah, but the above-mentioned method of its enforcement and encouragement is not Islamic, according to Muslim scholars, researchers and activists. Muslims have to start seeing the issue from a different perspective, they say.

Some arguments in support of non-Hijabi sisters

”I would say that the overwhelming majority of Muslim women I have met who don't cover and who believe in God, believe they should cover, but believe they're not ready yet,” says Sharifa Alkhateeb, vice-president of the North American Council of Muslim Women, in an interview with Sound Vision.

This reality indicates there is a seed of faith that needs to be nurtured and encouraged. As well, it means these women need all the support they can get.

Abdalla Idris Ali is a member of the Islamic Society of North America's (ISNA) Majlis Shura, which debates Islamic issues and establishes policy for the organization. He says what also has to be remembered is that many Muslim women are coming from cultures where the Hijab is not practiced, for whatever reason. These sisters should not be condemned. Rather, Islamic concepts like Hijab, should be explained to them.

Another possibility is that Muslim women who do not wear Hijab are coming from families which are either not practicing Islam, or are downright hostile to it.

In this situation, “it's actually a celebration that a young Muslim woman wants to pray Juma,” says Kathy Bullock, who started wearing Hijab two weeks after she converted to Islam.
“I think that's where the tolerance comes in.”

Another reason some Muslim women may find Hijab difficult is because of the often negative ideas surrounding Hijab. For instance, that wearing Hijab kills marriage and job prospects. Muslim activists must seek to dispel such myths.

”There needs to be a lot more support for the women who decide to cover,” says Bullock, who completed a PhD. about The Politics of the Veil from the University of Toronto in January.

Bullock also gives a chilling warning to those who condemn non-Hijabi Muslim women: “We might be wearing Hijab but we might be doing something incredibly wrong which cancels out the reward [for wearing it].” One of these things she mentions is arrogance.

Why are some Muslims so sensitive about the Hijab?

Some Muslims seek to condemn non-Hijabis out of their understanding of the Quranic injunction of enjoining the good and forbidding the evil. Yet, they fail to take the right approach in doing it, in accordance with the example of the Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him), which was one of kindness, gentleness and patience.

Interestingly, some Muslim men and women who criticize non-Hijabi Muslim women seem to have different reasons for doing it and varying ways of approaching a sister who does not wear Hijab.

“Unfortunately on the brothers' side there is a push to make Hijab the marker of Islamic identity,” says Bullock. She also emphasizes the hypocrisy of many Muslim men criticizing Muslim women who do not wear the Hijab, while they themselves wear tight jeans or pants, or short shorts. These forms of dress are strictly prohibited for men in Islam. Yet, go to any Juma or Jamaah prayer, and these forms of unIslamic dress can be easily seen.

”I think some of the men put too much emphasis on the women instead of looking at their own selves,“ she says.

However, Alkhateeb thinks most of the men are less vigilant than the women about Hijab, partly because they figure the women are going to take care of it.

She argues that the majority of the Muslim men who are over concerned about with the issue of Hijab because they don't trust themselves sexually, and fear their own reaction to a woman who is not covered Islamically.

For women, weak self-identity and faith could explain the harshness shown towards non-Hijabi Muslimas.

“It is so difficult to maintain the practice of covering, emotionally, psychologically on the job and in everyday life, you get so much negativity from other people that the reaction of most of the practicing women and activists is to develop a cocoon, a protective cocoon, and part of that protective cocoon is in continually, verbally and in other ways rejecting what is unlike yourself,” explains Alkhateeb.

“And that is to shore up your own self-identity. I think that part of the reason they are so negative is because this is part of shoring up their own self-identity and because there is a hidden fear that if they let down their guard that they'll stop covering. And if they allow any space in their mind to alternative ways of thinking that their thinking will fall apart. And that means that the underlying precepts and concepts are not strong.”

Where does Hijab fit on the Islamic ladder?

“While it is correct to say that Hijab is correct in the teaching of Islam we tend to forget that there are many other basic issues, why the over obsession?” asks Jamal Badawi, a member of the North American Fiqh Council.

Part of the reason some Muslims treat non-Hijabis so harshly is because of their lack of understanding about where the obligation of Hijab ranks on the Islamic ladder.

A more correct approach would be gradual and would mean implementing more important aspects of Islam, like Iman (faith), and praying five times a day before moving on to requirements like Hijab.

“We fail to see any Ayah (verse of the Quran) pertaining to Hijab in the entire Makkan revelation that was given to the Prophet, that's almost 13 years. The injunctions about more detailed aspects relating to the righteous Muslim community were revealed during the Medinan period. Some in the middle, and later part of that period,” explains Badawi.

“This is a revealing lesson for us because it shows that Allah knew in advance what injunctions He wanted to reveal,” he adds. “Yet He delayed the revelation of those matters until many, many years of preparation on the level of Iman, submission to Allah, love of Allah and the sincere desire to voluntarily obey Allah and His Messenger. Once that base was established it wasn't difficult at all for the believing women to willingly abide by the injunctions of Allah."

Badawi says this is similar to how the Islamic commandment forbidding intoxicants was introduced.

“The same process of preparation took place to the point that when the final prohibition of intoxicants was revealed it wasn't difficult for men to abide by that willingly and immediately.” He explains this was especially difficult for Muslim men, who were the ones reported more likely to consume alcohol than women at that time.

“Some well-intentioned Muslims seem to miss these lessons from the gradual revelation and become too legalistic to the point of doing more harm than benefit, notwithstanding their good intentions,” adds Badawi.

Wrongly using the "baseball bat" approach to the Hijab

“Muslims gain a little bit of knowledge and they want to run around with a baseball bat and beat people over the head with religion. That's exactly what [has] made many young people leave the mosque,” says Alkhateeb.

Using the right method to tell Muslim women about Hijab is crucial, just as it is in advising Muslims to implement any other requirement of the faith.

“In the Prophet's whole life he led by encouragement not pressure,” she says. “The way he behaved is the opposite of how most Muslims who are practicing Muslims behave towards each other in terms of giving advice. His way was not carrying around a religious baseball bat.”

The thinker and writer, who has also been an activist for the last 35 years points out the “baseball bat” methodology is in full swing when many Muslims encounter non-Hijabis.

“Instead of inviting her and embracing her, they're immediately trying to think about what they can criticize her about,” says Alkhateeb.

The Prophet also did not use“vigilantes” to impose a religious requirement like Hijab.

“When we deal with the Sunnah, we find that he never appointed vigilantes to go around to reinforce something that believing Muslim women were encouraged to do, or use any harsh words or actions to arrive at that desired situation or desired setting,” says Badawi. “The approach that he followed which we should follow as our example was not to focus on issues like Hijab before Iman and psychological and spiritual preparation was in place.”

Badawi stresses inviting to Hijab and other Islamic requirements should be done in a way “that would motivate people to respect the moral values of society rather than simply forcing them to do so. In fact that goes back to the definition of Islam which is willing trusting and loving submission to Allah and obedience to His Messenger.”

As an example, he cited an incident from the lifetime of the Prophet when a Bedouin man urinated in the mosque. When other Muslims saw this, they became very angry and wanted to rebuke him harshly.

The Prophet on the other hand, stopped them and told the man gently what he was doing was incorrect.

“That story is a classic example of the contrast between the attitudes of some well-intentioned Muslims who want to correct the wrong immediately and by any means and the approach of the Prophet of kindness, gentleness, persuasion and wisdom,” he explains.

Temporarily tolerating the wrong: a rule of Usul al-Fiqh

“The other aspect which is frequently missed is another rule of ordaining the good and forbidding the evil which was addressed by many scholars especially by the famous Shaykh ul Islam Ibn Taymiyyah,” says Badawi. “The rule basically is that if in a given situation, attempting or trying to forbid the wrong may result in greater harm than benefit, then it is better to tolerate the wrong on a temporary basis.”

“I think the classic example that Ibn Taymiyyah is referred to is when the Tatars invaded Muslim lands,” explains Badawi. “He was told that some of these soldiers were drinking and that they should be stopped because this is part of forbidding the wrong yet, he advised that they should be left alone. His reasoning was that if those soldiers become sober, they might go on killing more people which is a greater harm than drinking”.

“This is not a new rule,” he emphasizes. ”It is a basic rule in Usul al-Fiqh, the roots of Islamic law, that if some harm is inevitable then it is better to tolerate the lesser harm in order to prevent great harm.”

Badawi demonstrates how this rule could apply to a situation where a Muslim sister who does not wear Hijab attends Juma prayer.

“For example, if that sister is approached in a harsh way she may not come again which could hurt her and hurt the community at large. But if she's welcomed first and there's demonstration of brotherhood and friendship, then in a gentle and wise way that is suitable for her, she can be encouraged, then of course it would be a far better result than the confrontational, harsh approach.”

Involving non-Hijabi sisters in activities

“It's only by mixing in the right company that someone who is contemplating Hijab will have the strength and courage to make the final act,” says Bullock.

This means women offering friendship, as well as involving the sisters in Islamic activities through organizations like Muslim Students' Associations. Bullock notes that if a Muslim woman wants to do something for Islam she should be applauded “because she could be out there doing something else.”

“Muslim organizations have a duty to say what is right and to invite in the best of manner women to cover and to support them when they do so but that doesn't mean individuals should be judgmental when women are not covering,” she adds.

Involvement, but not leadership

However, Ali and Badawi draw the line of involvement of non-Hijabi Muslim women in Muslim organizations at the leadership level.

They both say that any Islamically-oriented organization will select a person to be their leader who reflects their goals and aspirations. That means a Muslim woman who does not wear Hijab would not be selected because she is not fully following the precepts of Islam. Similarly, a Muslim man who is not fulfilling Islamic obligations like prayer, chaste behavior, etc. would also not be selected for a leadership position in such a milieu.

Badawi says this is not exclusion. Rather, it is the natural outcome in any milieu which aims to be Islamically-oriented. Its leadership will represent the precepts of Islam as much as possible.

“I'm against the term exclusion because if we apply the Islamic Shura (consultative) method then the leadership would emanate from the people, will be chosen by the people. And if the community or Islamic organization in a given setting are truly Islamically oriented, one would expect that the person chosen to be the spokesperson and symbol of that organization should reflect their conviction and values in the best possible way.”

A Positive Approach

Badawi gives an example of how he, “with my weaknesses” approached an aggressive non-Hijabi sister and the result.

Many years back, during a visit to Australia, one sister, during one of his lectures, a non-Hijabi Muslim woman asked questions about Hijab, in a disapproving manner. He talked to her kindly and give information without harshness.

Two years later, he returned to Australia, and a sister in full Hijab approached him, asking if he recognized her. He did not.

“I am the one who was arguing with you about Hijab two years ago,” she told him. “But it is the approach and information that you gave me that helped me to study more, to educate myself and to make up my own decision and I am happy with what I decided.”

Photo Attribution: http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Afghanistan_National_Police_provide_security_during_a_Humanitarian_Assistance_mission_at_a_women%27s_center_outside_Bagram,_Afghanistan_on_July_18,_2005_050718-A-UK569-053.jpg

Comments

Please be patient with yourself, and much kinder than you are being.

YOU ARE NOT A HYPOCRITE. You are a baby, and you need to grow slowly. Particularly in today's negative environment, you want to educate yourself about your new religion before discussing it too much with negative people. You WILL be asked to justify this,, that and the other. So take time to become stronger and more knowledgeable. Work on your understanding of the Holy Quran translated into your own language since this is the Operator's Manual for Life. Pray, starting with the prayer that is easiest and adding each one in as you become reliable in that one. Dress modestly to cover your body and don't worry about your hair yet. Fast Ramadan. Hang out with good people and stay away from haram activities.

Start with your closest friends, the ones you trust. Don't open yourself to random attacks from people you don't care about until you are stronger and better able to stand up.

BE KIND AND PATIENT WITH YOURSELF. Allah loves you and has blessed you with the insight to see his religion is the right way. Change your life in ways you can sustain, always working towards the goal of ultimate submission to Allah and trying to please him.

Masalaamah,
Shirley

Location

New Zealand

As salaam alaikoom! This article was very interesting to read. I didnt know that our own muslims sisters would discriminate one that was just starting out, that is kind of rude i think. This article although, did give me a lot of good information on the outlook of hijab. As some other sisters here, I do not wear hijab, but inshallah one day I will. I have come to a point in my life where I think, no i know i am ready to wear it, but just to nervous to start. But I know that Allah[swt] knows my intentions and He will inshallah help me to start and complete my iman. Thank you for posting such a great article and enriching us with these points about Islam and hijab. May Allah[swt] always lead us in the right path and help those who are trying to get the courage [like me] to begin hijab...aameen. Iltemaz-e-dua, khuda hafiz-Nadia=)

Location

Virginia

Salam. I am a "born" Muslim woman raised in America since the age of 5. I recently began wearing the Hijab on October 13th, 2004. I always tried to keep Allah in my heart and the fear of his punishments. I always prayed to Him to guide me towards the righteous ways. And Alhamdullah He did. After I began wearing the hijab I automatically changed my lifestyle and dressing, I began praying 5 times a day, and began really learning my religion from the Quran and Hadith. The one very important aspect I did learn about Hijab is that it is not just my scarf or the shawl I wear to cover my body or the long shirts or the loose pants, but it also is the hijab of my glance, my thoughts, my actions, and the hijab of my "neeyat", both for men and women. One can wear layers of clothing where no part of the body is seen and still stare, give flirting looks, flirtatiously chat with the opposite sex, etc. The one very important thing in the Quran is the Hijab of your glances for man and woman. I think a man or woman who lowers their glances in the presence of the opposite sex is much more in fear of Allah than someone who is all covered and still shamefully glancing away. I'm trying to adopt the Quranic ways with my Hijab, not only with my scarf or clothes but also with my glances and clean thoughts in my heart and mind, InshaAllah! I pray that Allah will guide all of our Muslim bothers and sisters towards the righteous ways. I think more emphasis should be given with the Hijab of the inner sole rather than ONLY the Hijab of the hair and body. Both are equally needed to follow the Islamic way of life. Salam.

Location

New Jersey

Bismillah Ar-Rahman Ar-RahimBeing born and raise in America and reverting back to my orginal way of life, Islam, and having the blessed experience to be raise in Islam by Imam W.D. Mohammed since 1975, I thank the Almighty Allah for this website and articles like this one. Not ever claiming to be holier then thou, but our muslims women here in America have never, ever faced the troubles that many of my muslims are facing now. My former wife worn her headwrap and made her top longer and pants in the same fashion as the medical uniform. Worn the whites shoes and has retired from the medical field as a nurse and has never been told to change her Islamic appearance. My three daughters attended public schools here and have never been told to take it off or go home. As I and the millions of followers of Imam Mohammed have learn, "Hijab" means to "cover". Cover that which will have attention drawn unto you in a negative way. This cover, covers your three stages of development, mental, physical and spiritual. I as a African-American Muslim male I like the dress of my middle-eastern sister with the full hijab, as it varies from country to country in our muslim world, but what I don't like is that the style of Hijab that America is portraying upon the muslim sister is what wrong, not the hijab itself. I must say openly that I was never taught that the Hijab style of dress as we see it today on the news daily is the "official dress of the muslim world,as ordained by Prophet Mohammed(PBUH) and can never change. Never read in the Holy Qu'ran that this Hijab garment is it and nothing else will do. Oh no! This is wrong to think that way. We are all changing everyday (insha-llah) by Islam and I truly believe that Prophet (PBUH) spoke of many changes to come through our growth in trying to perfect Islam in our lives. To cover ones self in her/his day, the full Hijab was needed for woman due to the envirnoment of the country as well as to the covering of oneself in Islam. "Black" is not the official color of Hijab is it? No, it is not. Once the sisters from outside America realise that they are free to let the Iman show more outwardly, and they realise that their husband are truly looking to see if she can follow Qu'ran on her own, ( as Allah has ordained) he will not be obligated to dress her. But the fear of letting her out makes him and others think negative thoughts about her, especailly to those sister who are not like her. There is no compusion in Islam, none of the million of sisters that follow Imam Mohammed have face this small misunderstanding about Hijab. The non-Islamic American have never outwardly attack the African American sisters like this, and that is because they've watched and learn Islam grow from within the country. Honestly speaking as your brother to both males and females muslim that (isha-llah) should be bless to read my comment(if printed) must understand, that the non-Muslim Americans are watching to see if you all are following closely to us, born and raise here. If you do as we have done as your guides in America you can live your religion out in America, because Allah has planned to raise Islam in America from within. Hijab is not a fighting issue amongst us here, We are glad and very proud to have, to see you come here, but not to fight over how to cover. Sisters, if your Deen or Din is right, or you on coming back to it, then cover yourself for the sake of Allah, not for the sake of what Aisha, Khalilah, Fatima,etc. have to say to you about how they dress compare to how you dress. Cover for the sake of Allah, wrap your head so that your beautiful attractive hair does not show, roll down your shelves and button the cuff, make sure that your shirt or top cover rear bumper and your front end is not even a worry, wear you pants loose, (because as the American non-Muslim women has learn the hard way, tight-fitting jean leads to an " negative medical itch") and make prayer. Then at the next jum'ah wear an traditional Hijab of a flowery colors and pattern that is in season, then change up again for the next Jum'ah. First hand knowledge has shown me that the Hijab is being changed in the back seat of sl500 as it speeds out of Riyadh crossing the bridge into Bahrain on a Friday night, sholud I say more about where that sister in at today. As many of us have read in this article that the "outward image does not necessarily mirror the inner image." I love this website, I love the articles and I tuly love those who speak out and those who are finding Islam to be "what America is telling you is not true Islam" is negative. Using the glossary of the website, I leave with this- "Hijab= ANY kind of veil-it. The facial Hijab is divided into two types: Niqab full facial covering, Khimar: partial facial covering, leaving the eyes exposed. It is said that the universe is what veils Allah from the creation. If you find the veil awe-inspirin, how much more awe-inspiring is the one behind the veil!" Allah-u-Akber. Sister don't get caught up on fashion, it will always go out of style. But style will always be "in-fashion" If you awe me with just your blue, green, brown, black eyes today at Juma'h and then smile at me again without the veil and your skirt-set is long and bright and not tight, to where I must gazed into your eyes but I can not placed them as the eyes that I saw last week and you then do your normal girl thing and laugh at me because I just can't remember, then Allah is smiling with us both. We are Muslims and we have placed Allah first and our Hijab is correct, for we are covered properly from within to where our outside is not an issue. I hope and pray that my comments makes this pages and I thank SoundVision for this website. Insha-llah remember we have made America accept Al-Islam ever since 1930, you have to decise if you are going to accept what is in place and then change up on them, and smile and keep them guessing. I love you all. May Allah continue to bless us to receive His Light of understanding. As-Salaam-Alaikum, your Brother Michael

Location

Chandler, Arizona

As a Young Muslim Teenage Girl trying to understand and learn about her religion, I am yet to wear hijab. I have often thought about it, but do not consider myself ready. Before I wear hijab, I want to understand Islam and its principles. I do not want to be one of those people who do something while not understanding its meaning and purpose of it. I feel that the feeling of superiority that some Muslim women show towards those that are not yet ready to wear hijab is not right. Inshallah, in time, I will have studied Islam extensively, come to understand it, wear hijab, and help others reach the same point.

Location

South Carolina

very balanced, thorough, well-rounded and 'wise' article demonstrating the true spirit of Islam. tolerance, compassioin, and love.mashaAllah.Esp. useful were the otherwise uncommonly quoted examples of incidences relating to approach of the Holy Prophet (pbuh).

Location

pakistan

Salam,May the Peace and Divine Light of Allah be with us all.I found the articles about Hijab quite interesting.I am a muslim but I do not wear Hijab.I believe that being a muslim woman is a lot more than a piece of cloth.And from my own personal experience SOME not all hijab wearing sisters are quite mean.They have what I would refer to as "a holier than thou attitude". In my opinion it is a complete contradiction in terms if a woman covers herself from head to toe to appear pure but her thoughts, words and actions are impure, mean and downright cruel. Hijab under those circumstances is mere window dressing designed to fit in with the crowd rather than a sincere disposition that reflects the true light of islam.Only Almighty Allah can judge who the true believers are - Hijab or not.

Location

New Jersy

Most of the discussion, in reference to Hijab, is with the piece of garment that muslim woman of some middle eastern countries e-g Egypt, Jordan, Palestine and a couple of other Arab countries wears to cover her head. But this form of "Hijab" is not necessarily the only form of "Hijab" as required by Quran or Sharia. For example women of Indo-Pak subcontinent wear Burqa or Large Shawl to cover entire body including head etc. Women of Afghanistan and Iran have different type of dress. But they all adhere to basic Islamic requirment i-e purity and modesty. Then why some so-called muslim scholars emphasize Hijab only in the form that is practised in the middle-eastern countries mentioned above? Islam does not approve montoony. It encourages diversity, respecting different cultures and still obvserving purity and hijab according to Quranic injuntions.I, therefore, reject the idea that all muslim women should wear a uniform dress (Like Middle-Eastern Scarf type Hijab) to be acceptable and recognized as muslimah. My wife and daughter wear "duppata" and wear loose garments and I have no problem with that. That is better then wearing a headscarf and exposing the rest of the body to the world.

Location

Pennsylvania USA

Thank You so much for providing such great information on this and many other subjects that might otherwise go unrsearched. Islamic research is vital to proper knowledge.Salaam

Location

CAlifornia USA

assalam u alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatahualhamdulillah!! excellent site.Yes, Iman is the key; so to is love, patience and kindness from hijabi sisters to non-hijabi sisters in helping establish their iman and their understanding of hijab. may ALLAH (swt) make it easy for all my hijabi sisters and insha'ALLAH, soon to be hijabi sisters, ameen. Allah Hafiz

Location

trinidad, west indies

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