Technology has made life easier in countless ways. Today, our parents and grandparents can stay connected with family, manage their finances, shop, access healthcare information, attend Islamic classes, and keep up with the world, all from a phone or computer. But these conveniences also come with new risks. Online scams, phishing messages, financial fraud, and privacy threats increasingly target older adults. As families, we have a responsibility to help our elders navigate the digital world with confidence, safety, and dignity.
For Muslim families, this responsibility goes beyond technology. It reflects the values of mercy, amanah (trust), and birr al-walidayn (kindness and dutifulness toward parents). Protecting our elders is one way to put these values into practice in a changing world. Scammers often target older adults because they may be less familiar with rapidly changing technology. A message can appear to come from a bank, government agency, delivery company, doctor, or even a family member and still be fraudulent. Warning signs include messages that create urgency, requests for passwords or verification codes, unexpected requests for money or gift cards, links asking for personal or financial information, calls about problems with bank accounts or government benefits, and social media accounts pretending to be someone they know. The important lesson is simple: a message can look trustworthy and still be a scam.
One of the most effective protections is also one of the simplest: pause before acting. Scammers often use fear, urgency, or excitement to keep people from thinking carefully. Teach your parents and grandparents to stop and ask, “Do I really need to act right now?” Usually, the answer is no. Rather than clicking a link in an unexpected message, encourage them to independently open the company’s official app or website. Instead of calling a number provided in a suspicious message, use a trusted number from a bank statement, official website, or the back of a bank card. Families can establish a simple rule: if someone is pressuring you to act immediately, stop and check with someone you trust. Just as importantly, there should never be embarrassment attached to asking for help.
Financial scams can be especially devastating because they may involve a lifetime of savings. Strong, unique passwords, multi-factor authentication, banking alerts, and careful attention to unexpected payment requests can provide important protection. Verification codes should never be shared with someone who unexpectedly calls or messages, and requests for gift cards, cryptocurrency, wire transfers, or other unusual forms of payment should be treated with caution. No family member should ever feel ashamed for making a mistake. If an elder clicks a suspicious link, shares personal information, or sends money to a scammer, the priority should be getting help quickly rather than assigning blame. The sooner a problem is reported, the more opportunities there may be to limit the damage.
Social media can be a wonderful way for grandparents to stay connected with children, grandchildren, friends, and the wider community, but sharing too much information can create privacy and security risks. Sit with your elders and help them review who can see their posts and photos, who can send them messages, whether their phone number or email address is publicly visible, which friend or follower requests they accept, whether location information is being shared, and which apps have access to their accounts. Remind them that a familiar name and profile picture do not necessarily mean an account belongs to someone they know. Scammers can copy photos and create remarkably convincing fake profiles.
One particularly frightening scam involves someone pretending to be a child, grandchild, or other relative. The scammer may claim to be in trouble and urgently need money, sometimes using information gathered from social media to sound convincing. Teach your elders to verify unexpected emergencies through a separate method of communication. If a message appears to come from a grandchild, for example, call that grandchild directly using a known phone number rather than replying to the suspicious message. Families can also create a simple secret phrase or question that only close relatives would know, providing another way to verify an unexpected emergency request.
Email remains another common way scammers reach people, so elders should be especially cautious with unexpected attachments and links, particularly when a message claims there is a problem with an account, payment, or subscription. Before clicking, ask, “Was I expecting this?” If not, verify it independently. Protecting the email account itself is especially important because access to email can allow someone to reset passwords for banking, shopping, social media, and other accounts.
Rather than waiting for something to go wrong, families can create a simple digital safety plan together. Help your parents or grandparents identify their important online accounts, enable multi-factor authentication, keep devices and apps updated, use a password manager if they are comfortable with one, set up banking and transaction alerts, review social media privacy settings, and learn how to report suspicious messages and scams. It is also helpful to identify one or two trusted family members they can contact whenever something feels wrong.
The goal is not to take control away from our elders, but to give them the tools and confidence to remain in control. In our desire to protect our parents, we can sometimes unintentionally make them feel incapable. Instead of saying, “You don't understand technology,” try saying, “Scams are getting more sophisticated. Let's make sure we're both protected.” Learn together, sit beside them while reviewing settings, and explain why something is risky rather than simply telling them what not to do.
Our elders have spent decades teaching us how to navigate the world. Digital safety gives us an opportunity to return that care. Islam places tremendous importance on treating parents and elders with kindness, patience, and respect, and protecting them in the digital world is one modern expression of those timeless values.
We cannot prevent every scam, but we can make sure our parents and grandparents know that they are never alone, never foolish for asking questions, and never too embarrassed to tell us when something goes wrong. The most powerful security tool may not be an app or a password. It may simply be a family member who says, “Before you click, call me.” And when our elders come to us for help, let us respond with the same patience and dignity they showed us when we were learning to navigate the world.
Author bio: Miriam is the proud mother of seven children of different ages, an experience that shapes her perspective on education and advocacy. Based in the Chicagoland area, she has taught in an Islamic school and currently works in a public school, supporting students and families and promoting inclusive learning environments. As the mother of a child with autism, Miriam brings personal insight and compassion to her work advocating for children with diverse learning and developmental needs. She is passionate about fostering inclusion, understanding, and equity within her community.
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