The Quran
1. "We have enjoined on man kindness to his parents; in pain did his mother bear him, and in pain did she give him birth" (46:15).
2. "Thy Lord hath decreed that ye worship none but Him, and that ye be kind to parents. Whether one or both of them attain old age in thy life, say not to them a word of contempt, nor repel them, but address them in terms of honor. And out of kindness, lower to them the wing of humility, and say: ‘My Lord! bestow on them Thy Mercy even as they cherished me in childhood' "(17:23-24).
3. "We have enjoined on man and woman kindness to parents; but if they (either of them) strive (to force) thee to join with Me anything of which thou hast no knowledge, obey them not'" (29:8).
4. "We have enjoined on man and woman (to be good) to his/her parents; show gratitude to Me and to thy parents; to Me is (thy final) Goal. If they (parents) strive to make thee join in worship with Me things of which thou hast no knowledge, obey them not; yet bear them company in this life with justice (and consideration) and follow the way of those who turn to Me (in love)" (31:14-15).
The Hadith
1. The Prophet Muhammad said, may Allah's peace and blessings be upon him: Your Heaven lies under the feet of your mother (Ahmad, Nasai).
2. A man came to the Prophet and said, ‘O Messenger of God! Who among the people is the most worthy of my good companionship? The Prophet said: Your mother. The man said, ‘Then who?' The Prophet said: Then your mother. The man further asked, ‘Then who?' The Prophet said: Then your mother. The man asked again, ‘Then who?' The Prophet said: Then your father. (Bukhari, Muslim).
3. Abu Usaid Saidi said: We were once sitting with Rasulullah when a man from the tribe of Salmah came and said to him: O Messenger of Allah! do my parents have rights over me even after they have died? And Rasulullah said: Yes. You must pray to Allah to bless them with His Forgiveness and Mercy, fulfill the promises they made to anyone, and respect their relations and their friends (Abu Dawud and Ibn Majah).
4. Abdullah ibn Amr related that the Messenger of Allah said: The major sins are to believe that Allah has partners, to disobey one's parents, to commit murder, and to bear false witness (Bukhari, Muslim).
5. It is narrated by Asma bint Abu Bakr that during the treaty of Hudaibiyah, her mother, who was then pagan, came to see her from Makkah. Asma informed the Messenger of Allah of her arrival and also that she needed help. He said: Be good to your mother (Bukhari, Muslim).
Photo Credits to Habib M’henni / Wikimedia Commons
Comments
don't leave her
my grandmother died 3 years ago, and my mom was the eldest and she 2 sisters, my mom thought that her mother always loved her 2 smaller daughters more then her, and would prefer them over her, it's a long story, it was like your story and at her last months when she was alive, my mom was to live with her, but she always thought the same way, but now when her mother, has died she realised that she was totally wrong, but now she regrets and says that she could be alive and she could serve her better , and my grandma wasn't able to walk or talk , she was paralysis, you will regret don't even think of leaving her a second , you also have children if one day you get old and lost your nows patient, because as you get older you will not have the patience of your young age, and you will not be the same person when you you get older, so when you get old and your children want's to leave you what will you fell ? just imagine your self as you child , and imagine your mother as your self, do you hate your child or your children ? Do you want to maker her/him your child seem bad to people ? Do you want such ? ofcourse not and also you want to always be with your children ? now when a person get old they became like children, they will argue in every thing, they will not listen to you, they will want to do whatever they wants, so now your mom wato you just like you are now to your children, so when you get old it's not your fault to react like and child or dont listen to anyone, it's just a part of nature of becoming old, so now it's not your mom who want's to make you frustrated, or it's she that want's to argue with you in food, if you your child says that he/she want's to eat something , and you say no so now your child is not gonna accept you no, they will say repeatedly the same thing , will you leave them ? and go in other house and leave them alone there ? so your mom is the same case , when you were child if you were to ask for something and your mother says no and you say again would your mother had to left you ? if you annoyed your mother, had she to left you , no she compromised her whole life and to make you in this stage, and now your are going to left her ? how much of her life is left , if she is annoying, or arguing over food or anything else, so sit with her and say to her why she shouldn't eat ? because she has became old and don't have the yesterday's strength, and if she is gossiping to neibours then she has no hobby, she has nothing to do whole day, she is a human she needs to talk to someone , she needs to talk about something, but when she has nothing to do or talk about something, she talks about you , try to make her read some books, try to give her books to read about prophet muhammad (peace be upon him) try to bring her Book of seerah of prophet muhammad (peace be upon him) these Books are spritualy relaxing and if she can't read the Books then audio, search in play store for (seerat un nabi peace be upon him) and there are so much audio apps there is one app with photo of a green minbar on it that one is very beautiful, they gets you in a different WORLD WHERE YOU WİLL FORGET WHAT İS İN THİS WORLD , AND WİLL BE FROM YOUR İNSİDE FELL BETTER .﴾MAY ALLAH SWT MAKE İT easy for you﴿
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Be strong and keep on serving your mother despite your problems.
I know you're going through a lot, and it must be hard. But, just keep on working towards goodness, keep on being strong. It's hard, I know it is but it's important to put aside all of your differences.. if your mother does not treat you so well, you should be the better person. You should, not only for your mother but for the sake of Allah have mercy on your mother and try your hardest to get along.
I have one advice for you and that is to fix what is between you and Allah and then you will see a difference between you and your mother because Rasulullah صلى الله عليه وسلم has said:
"The pleasure of Allah is found in pleasing the parents, and the anger of Allah is found in making the parents angry” - Musnad of Imam Ahmad
Listening to your mother is waajib. It's hard but it's important that you make duaa that Allah makes things easy for you. Remember that "Paradise lies under the feet of your mother".
The largest way of entering Jannah is by pleasing your parents. And, your mother comes before your father. If you're older, your mother may be reaching old age and as parents get older, the reality is they return to Allah and this can happen suddenly.. when parents are old, they have difficulties and they can also become impatient which can be frustrating and they say things and do things that we may not like but try to understand your mother. Have mercy on Her so that Allah has mercy on you. I know you serve her and I ask Allah that he rewards you but try not to argue with your mother..
It doesn't matter what she says, just please try to forget it; you have to. Be the better person.. place your trust in Allah and for the sake of Allah, whether you like what she does or whether you don't, don't argue.. If it is better for you, then I advise that you to move out of the house because sometimes being too close to someone can be irritating because you have a child and it's important that they have a good upbringing. However, if your mother is ill/ she is old, I would recommend that you stay with her.. may Allah make the decision easy.
Read salaat al istikharah.. and Allah will make the decision easier.
Mothers sacrifice a lot for there children and they gave birth to us and went through pain and they look after us as children.. now that you are older, and your mother is reaching old age, re-pay her..
I apologise for not understanding so well.. but Allah is the one who understands you most, complain to Allah, make duaa to Allah, turn to Allah and know that Shaytaan comes in the way becomes he wants to break familys apart. He makes people jealous and causes arguments. And know that when people are arguing, Shaytaan is amongst them.. Don't let him shaytaan enter your house.. Seek protection in Allah from shaytaan the rejected one.. I hope this is of some benefit to you.
I ask Allah that He fixes what is between you and your mother, makes things easier for you and grants you patience, Ameen.
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That sounds hard.
Loving your mother is difficult. I struggle to love mine.
Allah (swt) does not give a burden that your soul cannot bear. So if you have this, then He must know that you can handle it.
He cannot purify you without difficulty. If loving your mother was easy, then it wouldn't get you into heaven.
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Confirmation
I totally agree, Graham.
Book 40, Number :6778
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Honoring your parents
I have read mostly all major Holy Scriptures. As I have been given to understand by the grace of Almighty God, according to Holy Scriptures, the duty of attending parents, honoring them, to treat them with honor, loving kindness and even to lower to them the wings of humility (rather than saying to them a word of contempt, disrespect or repel them). Thus the duty bestowed upon us human beings is Scriptural, Godly and not humanly. We cannot argue for not attending them since they do this or that, the duty will not be abolished since we can not repay them even with the entire earth and its contents, as is written.
In the below given prescription from the Quran, this commandment is much more important than others, even when one's parents intend to become partners of Allah:
“But if they endeavor to make you associate with Me that of which you have no knowledge, do not obey them but accompany them in (this) world with appropriate kindness and follow the way of those who turn back to Me (in repentance). Then to Me will be your return, and I will inform you about what you used to do.” (QS. Luqman : 15).
In nutshell, one must have to treat with one's parents with due care, humble treatment and with utmost respect, as is commanded, irrespective of their conduct and behaviour.
I feel this will be much enough for you as of now.
(Hari Nand)
Pinjore, Haryana
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My mother
My mother is the most loving, most caring and most forgiving person I have ever met. I am truly blessed that Allah gave me This woman to be my mother and best friend.
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Parent
My mom starved me for one week just bcuz of misunderstanding btw us dat lead me to avoid talking to her,today i seek 4giveness frm her.would i be able to be 4give by allah.
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Firstly she has no right to
Firstly she has no right to starve you, that's abusive behaviour and a major sin.
If you stopped talking to her as a way of letting her know that you are upset with her then that could be permissible.
It's good that you apologised to your mother anyway however she should also seek your forgiveness too.
The things told by you go to
The things told by you go to show that you have no scriptural knowledge since all what has been suggested is out of human thinking.
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