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Page url: http://www.soundvision.com/Info/Islam/marriage.ideal.asp


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abeke, Nigeria - wrote on 1/10/2011 10:08:22 AM
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Comment:May Allah reward you for this inspiring article. I will like you to do an equally comprehensive exposition on the issue of polygamy in islam. Despite the fact that many sisters are willing to succumb to the will of Allah on the issue, the emotional bottleneck is worrisome.


Muslima, Chicago - wrote on 12/7/2010 2:27:50 PM
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Comment:Asalam alaikum..I was searching for things to read about Islamic marraiges because I have some real problems in mine. He lives in Arabic country and we've been together for a few years. I love him very much but I dont trust him. This is very hard for me and I find myself suspicious of everything he says to me now. The last time we were together he abused me very much and I had no help from anyone. He says to me now ( after many times I tried to get him to talk about this?) that he feels bad? and he was just upset? and now I find that he has been talking online to his female cousin (which is haram) and possibly to other women. He lied to me when I asked him and said he wasnt, but I see the names and when I asked him about his cousin he said it wasnt wrong, even after admitting the Qiran says this is forbidden? I am so hurt because I thought this was a marriage that would last, but now I think he dosnt love me as he always says and that this is all about a visa? I am so angry and I cant figure out how any man can pray and go to the Mosque much and read the Qiran everyday, but lie to me about his heart and his true intentions? Sometimes I believe women are treated so bad in Islam like the media portrays because of what I have gone through and what I read online from other women.I cant figure out if I should stay because marriage is honorable or if I should leave , but either way, I have been so hurt. I dont know how I can trust another Muslim man again.


yasir iqbal, lahore - wrote on 10/10/2010 3:32:40 PM
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Comment:asslamo alaikam im muslim from pakistan. im 31 years old .i want marry in canada or uk with muslim religious girl. If interested please respond with full details.only Genuine and serious replies plsease. pakistan yasir iqbal e mail : subhan80@live.com


Ibrahim Hayani, Toronto, Canada - wrote on 10/8/2010 11:14:19 PM
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Comment:This article is should be considered a "MUST READ" for every single Muslim man, whether married or not. It highlights the main qualities, and ingredients, that are needed for a successfully happy marriage. A marriage which is not founded upon trust, understanding, kindness, mututual respect, and honesty is bound to be more of a farce than marriage. It pains me beyond words to read the complaints made by some sisters (especilly those who converted to Islam for the sake of their husbands, initially at least) but ended up having to endure the pain and pressure of untrusting and bad tempered husbands. My advice to them (be they hasbands or wives) is to read, and reflect upon, Khalil Gibran's master piece THE PROPHET, and especially the chapter on Marriage, in which the immortal Arab American poet and philosopher said: " Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone, Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music." A Muslim husband should live by, and embody, the qulatities of Mercy and Compassion which we Muslims mention every time we prar or recite the Qur'an..."Bismillahi Al-Rahman Al-Raheem." In the name of Allah the most Compassionate, the most Merciful." Your brother in Islam


Kameelah, Cleveland - wrote on 9/15/2010 5:55:31 PM
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Comment:Being guided by family or an Imam, or a Waqil should help sisters select the right spouse for her. We have to be honest with ourselves as well as the ones we entrust to help us select the right mate. Some men use their weakness to control their women. Like if you are a good muslimina then I can be a good muslim. I printed the article and will try using some of its content to select one who is tight for me. I want to have the Prophet following brother as my life mate.


umi FATIMAH, saudi - wrote on 9/3/2010 7:48:34 PM
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Comment:NO marriage is perfect let me say this even to al those new sisters about to marry you will have few months even 6mths to a year of heaven bliss then it will be reality. At the end of the day marriage s abadah worship the only reason we marry is to for fill our deen and we marry as this is Will of Allah unlike the Catholics. Marriage is not easy I am a British convert married to a Saudi man for 10 years a miracle I converted to islam at a very young age 16. Married a man very quick the Islamic way moved to Saudi not knowing how the culture would be another planet. In life we try to overcome things Allah tests us with when you have kids you learn to except things more have patience. let me say this life is temp and short so if u have issues and u can bare them hang in there in the end it is worth it for your kids. I don’t think I know a single women that would say her life is perfect and she may not have made decision’s if her life was to be chosen again and she could go back. Men are hard work but marriage is like a plant u must water it to keep it alive men and women r not the same in thinking. Let me say even the most odd couples that marry from different backgrounds and cultures cna make it if they have one ting in commen love for Allah and their goal is jennah No one i think suffered more than me with the culture cause they say it is Islam it is not Infact I love England and I think u can be a good Muslim where ever you live it is in your heart. If have issues be patient for ur jennah and kids sake. After ala lit is Allah swt that brought u together for one reason or a not. Im happy now finally after 10 years my husband lived i uk for 7 yrs studied and speaks better English than me he compromises after al there was no way id ever become a Saudi women.. I miss the manner of women here like uk has ques order and manners uk no one pushes in que’s we have rule sheer rules what rules lol But we have all halal food no need ot check for pig ingredients’ the athan is nice praying anyway is normal being a Muslim Here is easy shops are open late. I miss the rain the green trees but I think to myself life is short i should be in the right place and bring my kids up in a Islamic place while i can I have been to mecca 8 times for umrah2 times for hajj being here makes that easy. Try to look at the good quality’s in ur husband and advice to women put uself first always dont have too much mercy it doe snot pay off. women r always giving men by nature are selfish. My prays to you all


ummi of 3 kids, saudi - wrote on 9/3/2010 7:47:27 PM
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Comment:is Allah swt that brought u together for one reason or a not. ethere wa sno way id ever become a saudi women.. I miss the manner of women here like uk has ques order and manners uk no one pushes in ques we have rule sheer rules what rules lol But we have all halal food no need ot check for pig ingreadiants the azen is nice praying anyway is normal being a muslimhere ie asy shops are open late. I miss the rain the green trees but i think to myself life is short i should be in the right place and bring my kids up in a islamic place while i can I have been to mecca 8 times for umrah2 times for hajj being here makes that easy. Try to lok at the good qualitys in ur husband and advice ot women put uself first always dont have too much mercy it does not pay off. women r always giving men by natuire are selfish. My prays to you all


ummi of 3 kids, saudi - wrote on 9/3/2010 7:40:32 PM
Rating: Rating

Comment:NO marriage is perfect let me say this even to al those new sisters about to marry you wil have few months even 6mths to a year of heaven bliss then it wil be reality. At the end of the day marriage s abbahad worship the only reason we marry is to forfill our deen and we marry as this is Will of allah unlike the cathplics. marriage is not easy I am a british convert married to a saudi man fo 10 years a mircle i converted to islam at a very young age 16 married a man very quick the islamic way moved to saudi not knowing how the culure would be another plannet. In life we try to overcome things allah tests us with when you have kids you learnt ot expcet things more patience. let me say this life is temp and short so if u have issues and u cna bare them hang in there in the end it is worth it for your kids I dont think i know a single women that would say her life is perfect and she may not have made decisionss if her life was to be chosen again and she could go back. Men are hard work but marriage is like a plant u must water it to keep it alive men and women r not the same in thinking. Let me say even the most odd couples that mary from different backgrounds and culures cna make it if they have one ting in commen love for Allah and their goal is jennah No one i think suffered more than me with the culure cause they say ti is islam it is not Infact I love england and i think u can be a good muslim where ever you live it is in your heart. If have isses be patient for ur jennaha nd kids sake. Afetr ala lit is Allah swt that brought u together for one reason or a not. Im happy now finally after 10 years my husband lived i uk for 7 yrys studied and speaks better english than me he compromises after al there wa sno way id ever become a saudi women.. I miss the manner of women here like uk has ques order and manners uk no one pushes in ques we have rule sheer rules what rules lol But we have all halal food no need ot check for pig ingreadiants the azen is nice praying anyway is normal being a muslimhere ie asy shops are open late. I miss the rain the green trees but i think to myself life is short i should be in the right place and bring my kids up in a islamic place while i can I have been to mecca 8 times for umrah2 times for hajj being here makes that easy. Try to lok at the good qualitys in ur husband and advice ot women put uself first always dont have too much mercy it doe snot pay off. womn r always giving men by natuire are selfish. My prays to you all


Cathi, San Francisco, CA - wrote on 8/24/2010 5:55:51 PM
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Comment:I married a "pious" Muslim man and the worst aspect of him is he is so very very easy to get mad at the drop of a hat. He is also so suspicious thinking I am doing haram which I am not. He trusts no one basically it seems and I dont care if I trust people, generally its not a big deal to me but I for sure should trust my husband. I dont think American women should marry Arab men. The mix is lethal and not a good ease into a relationship in which there are already a lot of responsibilities. My husband is very jealous of my kids and it is only we stay together I think because my kids now live their father. Its a tough road and I am a really easy going person. I dont know if we can make it to death due us part because he is really ready to leave every time he gets mad. And I feel like I dont even like Islam anylonger when I have seen two Muslim Arab men be problems in my life. Allah knows best but I am not happy. I wish Imams would really talk to the men about being good Muslim husbands because the divorce rate will continue to sky rocket and many young Muslim children will be lost in this life.


Mariam, Melbourne - wrote on 8/2/2010 1:53:28 AM
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Comment:Hi everyone! Its nice to read your comments. I think no matter what religion you being a good husband comes down to being a patient and understanding human being. The majority of bad marriages is down to poor communication and one or the other person getting angry. For my marriage what works is that when he has a bad day and bad temper I keep my mouth shut and dont argue with him. Same goes for him; If Im having a bad day he will listen then hug me at the end. We have been together for almost 7 years and this works..but you must explain to him it works both ways. Also remember boys "the woman is always right" Also if you both work full time- jump on your email and email him/her about whats being bugging you and what you would like done about it. (but only in a calm state). Most often getting it out in an email makes you realise you were angry for a silly reason.


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